Aggressive Behavior Vs. Passive Aggressive Behavior

Something has set you off. But, should you risk passive aggressive behavior, and hold it in, or should you let it out. Many people encounter this exact scenario every day, some handle it better than others. Regardless of that fact, the question is… should you suppress your anger, or be aggressive?

People who are aggressive seem to openly express their feelings, regardless of what may happen. They do not hold their feelings back at all. At times their aggressive actions may even make others feel nervous when they are around. When this occurs, some kind of anger management would not be a bad idea.

Anger management can help you to determine when and why you are angry. It is much easier to deal with anger when you know, and acknowledge, that you are angry. Once you are aware of being upset, the hard part is deciding what to do next. Despite how angry you may feel, there is always a choice in how you respond to it. You can choose to suppress, express, or control yourself.

Unfortunately most people who have issues with anger, completely bypass that step and react abusively. Anger management helps you to realize that expressing your emotions by talking it out, and suppressing violent feelings, is more beneficial. It can be a challenging process for some, but once a person masters control of their emotions, it will make it easier to keep from throwing something or hitting someone in the face - no matter how tempting it may be.

Taking a defensive point of view and letting their emotions take over is what aggressive people tend to do. Anything can set them off, which is why many are called hot headed. Interestingly enough, this seems to be the very reason why aggressive people learn to control their anger at a higher success rate than those who are passive aggressive.

Since, aggressive people are seemingly more predictable and are more abrupt in their reactions, they can look back and identify what sets them off, a little easier. A passive aggressive person, on the other hand, will have a harder time figuring out the source of their anger, because they tend to hold things in - which, in most cases, results in resentment. The initial cause of the resentment, is then not easily resolved because it is either buried or expressed in unhealthy ways.

By knowing what initiates thoughts of anger, both passive aggressive and aggressive people are more prepared to make healthier decisions in finding a common ground between being aggressive and assertive.

A key point is, that being aggressive should not be confused with being assertive. Aggressive people are more forceful or difficult. Assertive people take control, while being considerate of others. Being considerate is the key phrase here.

To start controlling anger by finding the right balance between passive aggressive behavior and aggressive behavior, see: Anger Management Tips. For simple ways to manage anger without drugs or therapy, visit: http://www.AngerDefense.com

- Quincy Barrett

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